February 11, 2014

Endings and Beginnings

The last few months of 2013 were filled with some very intense endings for me. My mother was in the final stages of her terminal illness, and my grant-funded project at work, something I worked on for 13 years, was coming to an end.

Generally, transitions like this in real life do not have fairy tale endings. If they did, our funder would have lovingly taken over our project and given it the same attention our team gave it. I would have communicated eloquently to the grantees what a privilege it was to serve them for 13 years and how much I would miss them. My mother and I would have exchanged our most heartfelt thoughts, feelings, and perfectly worded goodbyes. But I don't live in a fairy tale.

Photo Credit: Flickr: penelopejonze

What I'm left with is the thought that I want to reflect on these two major pieces of my life, even as I have moved on to new beginnings. Even as I have not had a chance to clear my office of those 13 years, nor my mother's condo of her 81 years.

Reflection is so important and yet, so hard to make time for. I owe it to myself to process the endings, so I can free up all of my energy for the new beginnings in my life.

I hope that by blogging once a week with some insights on one or the other of these endings, I'll be able to truly say goodbye to my project, and to my mother. I don't need fairy tale endings, but I do need to feel a sense of closure, and a sense that I have learned from these two major life experiences.

1 comment:

Tanika Co Valda said...
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